


Smokes and foxes

by Ostodvandi



Series: Sylvix week 2019 [2]
Category: Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
Genre: Ass Slapping, M/M, Modern AU, t rated because well, this is so silly i'm so sorry
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-15
Updated: 2019-10-15
Packaged: 2020-12-14 09:54:05
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 519
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21013847
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ostodvandi/pseuds/Ostodvandi
Summary: Sylvain wants Felix to quit smoking, Felix thinks Sylvain is a lot like a fox.





	Smokes and foxes

**Author's Note:**

> Hurrah for third day of sylvix week. Finally something fucking happy for these two.
> 
> The prompt I chose was modern au.

Felix likes listening to people sing, and maybe the fact that he’s terrible at singing has something to do with it. Sometimes he’ll help Annette out with her chores just to hear her made up songs, and he has attended Dorothea’s operas once or twice for special occasions.

However, there’s a special flavor to Sylvain singing some stupid love pop song while he washes the dishes and makes a little, equally stupid dance. Despite the mentioned stupidity of it all, Felix doesn’t complain. In fact, he can’t take his eyes off it - it’s not only that Sylvain’s ass is really nice to look at even after some years of staring at it.

Felix sighs, and lights a cigarette, expecting Sylvain to make a comment immediately.

Which, of course, he does.

‘Felix, you should stop that.’

‘Good lord,’ Felix groans. ‘Here you go again.’

‘You told me you’d quit smoking!’ he whines, like a big puppy would. Absolutely unnerving. ‘Feliiiiiiix…’

‘Don’t be a hypocrite like you don’t have vices yourself.’ Thought Sylvain would be more like a fox. Deceivingly smart. Way too bubbly and fluffy for the kind of personality that’s inside.

‘I have witnesses! Dimitri and Ingrid were right there.’

‘Like I care about their opinions on how I hold up my promises.’ A fox… Felix wonders what kind of sounds a fox makes. Wasn’t there a song about it? Whatever. They can’t possibly be as annoying as Sylvain when he gets like this. Or in general.

‘Well, you should care about how your very handsome and very dedicated boyfriend cares for your health, for one!’

Felix exhales smoke. ‘And where’s that boyfriend you’re talking about?’

‘Right here, babe.’ The massive idiot sticks out a leg as much as he can, and Felix’s eyes briefly focus on his ass again.

Felix leaves the cigarette on the ashtray and gets up.

He’s had enough.

A slapping sound seems to break the air in the kitchen, and Sylvain gasps, dropping the half-clean cup in his hands immediately.

He then looks at Felix sideways. His boyfriend of five years looks at him dead in the eye, the cigarette still between his teeth. His asscheek burns a little.

‘Don’t even think of telling anyone about it,’ Felix says. ‘Nobody will believe you.’

In awe, Sylvain stares back at him, knowing that, in fact, nobody will ever believe him, in his whole life. But another thought crosses his mind.

‘Do it again.’

Felix winces. ‘No.’

‘Come on!’ Sylvain cleans his hands and starts drying them. ‘Please!’

‘You disgusting degenerate.’ Felix blurts out, turning to get out of this cursed kitchen.

‘Says the one who slapped my ass in the first place!’ And before he can make his escape, Sylvain has captured him in a hug.

‘So you’d shut up!’ Felix squeaks, and Sylvain surely is trying not to laugh now.

‘I will if you smack it again.’

‘You’re going to make me vomit.’

A thing he didn’t have in mind before his small attempt at shutting Sylvain’s mouth, is that his boyfriend had the very irritating habit of turning everything Felix did against him.


End file.
